What is this bullshit going to talk about?
Well the last one, that has been for a long time ago I wrote, about a love that sadly it stayed there and nothing more happened (yep, I'm still single by the way), so this time is some stupid mistakes I have done for the past couple of months while I was at college, but what was that about?
Everyone of us maybe have done some stupidity in our entire life and thanks to those stupid mistakes we learn and be a bit more mature, so what I'm trying to say is that some of them it happens because of a reason and that reason can be so many than most of them are a pain in the ass for our parents, especially for my parents.
This year, that was my first year at college, yep, I'm a freshman (sadly, but yes) and I thought that everything was going to be a piece of cake, just like school, but no, no, no, no. This thing was totally different, it was another whole level, with a level of stress so high that even my brain cells went on holiday every single time I had an important exam. So I took the challenge and did my best in all my subjects, I try not to fail in none of them but sadly I did, but the reality is that for my teachers I failed 3 subjects when the truth is that I just failed 1, but why is it? The answer is easy: they were unfair with me, because in one occasion my literature teacher didn't check our exams well so he told us to give him our exams back, but if something went wrong we couldn't claim at all, because he never give us our exam back and we couldn't claim either if we didn't have a small piece of paper with our names and code on it, so I literally failed in that exam. The same happened the other time but it was with general administration (yeah, I'm studying administration and marketing), but this time I could claim that little piece of paper but the moment I checked in my user, and my score never changed, even though that my exam was 'ok', but the person that checked it was unfair and I lost 2 points, so I hope I can make justice the next week and ask why they never changed my unfair score. So now I'm pissed off and my parents are mad with me, and no matter what you do or say, they won't believe you.
So yeah, that was my biggest mistake I have done, and now it won't repeat itself for this new semester, I'm going to study more and leave every fun stuff aside (I was distracting myself too much last semester with games and with the social network) because I have seen that I have been destroying the base for my future
I think I understand why people say that be careful with Karma, because she's a total bitch. So no matter you try to avoid it, she comes and hits you at the lowest and painful part of you.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Sunday, June 30, 2013
Fantasy vs. Reality
I know that many of us have lots of fantasies and also dreams that some of them may come true in moments unexpected. Well, I'm going to confess that a situation like that happened to me last year, and the awkward part was that it happened with my male best friend. I know, there are always myths about it, like: "Oh! so you have a male best friend, well, I have to inform you that it's going to end really fucked up" and blah blah blah. I know that you are touching fire, because there is going to come a moment you have feelings for that person and you just want to go out of the friend zone. I wish that order would had happen but sadly it just didn't.
Lovely
Anyway, my story begins when I met him 3 and a half years ago. His name is Aaron, and he's an awesome friend, quite the opposite of me but even though we have some common things and most of the time we agree in most of the topics we talk.
As we know, no one in this world is perfect, am saying this because he is a bit arrogant and have a high ego, that most of our friends (we're at the same cycle of friends) don't feel comfortable when he start being like that, but thankfully they have me. Actually, I'm the only one that can low all of that, and it's funny because thanks to this we started to joke around, always, but always using sarcastic jokes that it never came to an end.
So we were like this for the past 3 years, until one day, he started acting a little bit awkward when we were at a small surprise party that we organized for an amazing friend, here name is Claudia and we are really close friends, even both of us are studying at the same university, but for him, she's his cousin.
Continuing the story, in that time I was in a relationship with someone (huge mistake, he's a fucking jerk and I never had feeling for him during all the time we were together, I was with him just for pity), so that day he knew because of my friends and every time I looked at him, he's eyes showed half jealous and half sad, and I'm like "what's the matter?".
A couple of weeks later, I knew the real truth.
I finished high school, and the prom party was just around the corner, actually, I liked my party just because of my friends, not the damn date I brought with me (my now ex boyfriend), the douchebag was looking at his phone all the party. Later on, I had some problems with him, and we broke up, and I made a mistake to forgive him after many days, even I didn't care of how he was feeling, (I'm not the normal girl that shows her feeling to the world, I would say that I'm like a rock).
During 2 weeks I didn't know anything about my dear friend, until one Saturday morning, I was so damn happy to finally what was up with him, until I asked about his prom party and he told me: "I don't want to go to my party, but my mom insist and worse of all, I don't have a date". And I started to tell him: "why don't pick your cousin or someone from our group?", he told me logic excuses like: "they're not going to find a dress in a couple of hours", "one of them is going to have her party today also", "I stop talking to that person", etc.
And from the blue, he asked me: "would you like to be my prom partner, please?", I didn't think twice and I told him yes, he couldn't believe it, he was so damn happy. I remembered telling him: "trust me, everything is under control".
His prom party was ridiculously amazing, no one knew me, and I didn't know none of them so that was perfect. I enjoyed it so much, more than my own prom party.
Until the truth appeared
We were dancing like usual, and then we hugged like normal, and I was feeling a little bit tired so I lay my head over his left shoulder, still dancing but slower and he started singing in my ear and gave me small kisses in my cheek that woke me up, I wanted to see his face and tell him: "what's up that?", instead he just kissed me. That kiss changed everything, it changed even me...
I thought it was a dream I've dreamed before, that I could wake up in any moment like usually, but it seemed so real, that I knew I wasn't sleeping.
I was with him and not in my bed.
That dream came true and changed my whole life
Lovely
Anyway, my story begins when I met him 3 and a half years ago. His name is Aaron, and he's an awesome friend, quite the opposite of me but even though we have some common things and most of the time we agree in most of the topics we talk.
As we know, no one in this world is perfect, am saying this because he is a bit arrogant and have a high ego, that most of our friends (we're at the same cycle of friends) don't feel comfortable when he start being like that, but thankfully they have me. Actually, I'm the only one that can low all of that, and it's funny because thanks to this we started to joke around, always, but always using sarcastic jokes that it never came to an end.
So we were like this for the past 3 years, until one day, he started acting a little bit awkward when we were at a small surprise party that we organized for an amazing friend, here name is Claudia and we are really close friends, even both of us are studying at the same university, but for him, she's his cousin.
Continuing the story, in that time I was in a relationship with someone (huge mistake, he's a fucking jerk and I never had feeling for him during all the time we were together, I was with him just for pity), so that day he knew because of my friends and every time I looked at him, he's eyes showed half jealous and half sad, and I'm like "what's the matter?".
A couple of weeks later, I knew the real truth.
I finished high school, and the prom party was just around the corner, actually, I liked my party just because of my friends, not the damn date I brought with me (my now ex boyfriend), the douchebag was looking at his phone all the party. Later on, I had some problems with him, and we broke up, and I made a mistake to forgive him after many days, even I didn't care of how he was feeling, (I'm not the normal girl that shows her feeling to the world, I would say that I'm like a rock).
During 2 weeks I didn't know anything about my dear friend, until one Saturday morning, I was so damn happy to finally what was up with him, until I asked about his prom party and he told me: "I don't want to go to my party, but my mom insist and worse of all, I don't have a date". And I started to tell him: "why don't pick your cousin or someone from our group?", he told me logic excuses like: "they're not going to find a dress in a couple of hours", "one of them is going to have her party today also", "I stop talking to that person", etc.
And from the blue, he asked me: "would you like to be my prom partner, please?", I didn't think twice and I told him yes, he couldn't believe it, he was so damn happy. I remembered telling him: "trust me, everything is under control".
His prom party was ridiculously amazing, no one knew me, and I didn't know none of them so that was perfect. I enjoyed it so much, more than my own prom party.
Until the truth appeared
We were dancing like usual, and then we hugged like normal, and I was feeling a little bit tired so I lay my head over his left shoulder, still dancing but slower and he started singing in my ear and gave me small kisses in my cheek that woke me up, I wanted to see his face and tell him: "what's up that?", instead he just kissed me. That kiss changed everything, it changed even me...
I thought it was a dream I've dreamed before, that I could wake up in any moment like usually, but it seemed so real, that I knew I wasn't sleeping.
I was with him and not in my bed.
That dream came true and changed my whole life
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Magic glasses are not as magic as they seem
Recently I have experienced many awkward, great and not so great stuffs that many of us had lived maybe a couple of times or just never, well the thing is that the nerd girl inside me just came out at last, I mean, the study girl not the lazy girl that doesn't care about life, about the future, she just want to enjoy what is happening in that moment and live in a free way. But that is not going to happen anymore, I knew I were in trouble at the university because I was failing 2 subjects but I couldn't tell to no one, but recently I started to get a bit better, even I feel like an Asian dude or like those Asian jokes that present a Asian crying even though he/she had passed but with a 98% or 99%. I understand that in those countries, those kids kill themselves studying until very late at night because they must have perfect marks so their parents can feel proud because they know they are going to have an excellent future.
But the reality is different here, there are guys that never study and they have or good grades or really bad, others that study very hard have excellent or good grades but they don't have no social life. And there is another zone where you are "ok", in that zone is where my name is written. Even I study a lot, I try my best to pass, and when I feel that I've done a good job, I receive a awful mark because at first it was cool and then the teacher ask you if you could give your exam back because there were some mistakes, and thanks to that I've failed one exam that I thought I was "ok". I was really pissed off, I wanted to kill my teacher so badly and that's why I hate him from now on.
That's why, never, but never feel confident or think that you made it, because you know how Karma is, she is just a motherfucking bitch that makes your life miserable.
Thursday, June 6, 2013
Living nightmare
For the past few years, life has been normal with no stress or other difficulties but when I knew last year that that life I was living was going to an end, but not a good one, it was actually a dead end where there where no hopes, no life and no happiness, just black around it's corners. That end was starting College, at first I was happy with it but I never thought that all my fears were going to be so flesh, so visible that every morning the reality was there but I always said to myself that it was just a dream, a really bad dream.
But there are some benefits, and also some tears while looking at the clock and then the exam that you have in front of you and just realize that you haven't study enough for it and you may fail or even if you are lucky, you may pass it. That had happen to many of us since school year, where it used to be so lovely at the beginning where in math you learned the simple things and after a couple of years it got worse, making it the nightmare no matter if you were sleeping or being awake, math was there. And now, it is just a creepy monster that you try to kill it, but every time you cut it, it duplicates and the fear is growing and you can't hide from it any longer.
On the opposite, there are others that like seeing you suffer and laugh about it, even that they had have the same feeling a couple of years ago and were in the living nightmare.
But there are some benefits, and also some tears while looking at the clock and then the exam that you have in front of you and just realize that you haven't study enough for it and you may fail or even if you are lucky, you may pass it. That had happen to many of us since school year, where it used to be so lovely at the beginning where in math you learned the simple things and after a couple of years it got worse, making it the nightmare no matter if you were sleeping or being awake, math was there. And now, it is just a creepy monster that you try to kill it, but every time you cut it, it duplicates and the fear is growing and you can't hide from it any longer.
On the opposite, there are others that like seeing you suffer and laugh about it, even that they had have the same feeling a couple of years ago and were in the living nightmare.
Tricky or Simple
I have so many thoughts that I don't know to say it loud and all the universe may know about it or just continue having them to myself, but having them for such a long time can be very distracting.
This may not sound so great nor it's going to be so simple, because I have no idea what I'm writing at this moment, words are just coming to me like there where around me, telling me to write with no sense at all. Even that am going to come to one point of this. This is maybe a blog or a fanfic or just words about something or someone or even about me and my life, that I want to share with you or with no one at all in specific.
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